The Shroud Underground

I've had some pretty bad rejection slips in the past. One of my favorites was "Are you serious?" Another one was "There will be icewater in Hell before you get in this magazine."

What are some of your worst rejection comments?

I had one that essentially said:

"Don't ever do that... never EVER do that in a story..."

Ouch!! I can't compete. The worst I've received are just form letters or emails. I hate waiting 4 months for a No Thanks email. No one ever got mean with me, but offline I might like to know which markets those were so I can avoid them. AN editor can't expect writers to be professional if they can't even be civil.

How about a good one that might as well have been bad? When I'd just completed my first novel (5 years ago), I sent 3 chaps to Ace/Bantam. The editor replied with a form rejection, but wrote on it: "I enjoyed this, but won't go any further until you have an agent." I was ecstatic, to say the least.

Believe it or not, for two years, I couldn't get an agent, even including a copy of that form with my proposals. Most didn't even bother to reply. I tried every one that said they would represent SF, then gave up. Some even complimented my writing, but said, "too many clients." "Just not right for me." or some such.

I have an agent now, but she's fairly new at it and besides, I'd given up and published that particular book with a small press publisher who has done a lot for me in his mags.

I guess about the worst I ever got was an editor who said he couldn't "relate" to my squid-like aliens in a story I have yet (hopefully) to place.

The funniest when I sent a story around about a condemned man who suddenly found a phone on the wall of his cell on death row. One editor actually wrote: "The title doesn't work. The phone wasn't a cell phone; it was on the wall." (I finally threw that story in the trash, NOBODY liked it.)

Take care,

JohnB

I had one that was a photocopied form letter with the heading "Kill Your TV" - which went on to describe the editor's poorly written and very pseudo-intellectual rant about (his perceived) sad state of contemporary fiction...

The most disheartening was from a high-profile magazine, whom I had build up somewhat of a rapport with over the years (the editor always sent very insighful and encouraging feedback with his rejections, and always asked to see more). Long story short, a novella that I'd been working on for the past four years called "The Martian In the Garden" (which I knew in my heart would be just PERFECT for this publication) elicited a form letter rejection from the editor's ASSISTANT, which arrived in my mailbox not 3 days after I'd sent the manuscript---in my opinion, not nearly enough time for the 19K word piece to have been read and considered. (Note, this is a pub that specializes in novella lengths, and all submission guidelines were followed to a tee).

Ah well, we persevere...!

Not too many that were overtly negative, but I got one the other week that said my story had too much cow f**king in it.

I laughed my ass off on that one.

What the ?

Sounds like a very interesting story Nathaniel. I hate it didn't get published, I'm sure it would have been an entertaining read. Dude, I've got to ask this: what is your story about?

No nasty rejections, but I did once get an acceptance that raked my story over the coals before telling me they would publish it. All in all, it was the most insulting thing I have ever read. You have to wonder what they guy says to people he likes!


PS: The insulting part was that his take on my story was absurd. He basically accused me of writing some feminist manifesto (ok, I exaggerate but not by much!) and was extremely patronizing. As for being feminist, there are probably issues of Playboy that had a stronger feminist agenda than my story did

John P. Wilson wrote:What the ?

Sounds like a very interesting story Nathaniel. I hate it didn't get published, I'm sure it would have been an entertaining read. Dude, I've got to ask this: what is your story about?

It's about an alcoholic farmer who does battle with a sex-crazed demon bull.

Natalie~
The more I thought about your terrible acceptance, the angrier I got. I think you did the right thing be declining it.

Natalie L. Sin wrote:No nasty rejections, but I did once get an acceptance that raked my story over the coals before telling me they would publish it. All in all, it was the most insulting thing I have ever read. You have to wonder what they guy says to people he likes!

Interesting... Did you let them publish it? What was the editorial process like?

Scott wrote:

Natalie L. Sin wrote:No nasty rejections, but I did once get an acceptance that raked my story over the coals before telling me they would publish it. All in all, it was the most insulting thing I have ever read. You have to wonder what they guy says to people he likes!

Interesting... Did you let them publish it? What was the editorial process like?

I withdrew the story after seeking advice from other writers. All in all, people thought I was being used to set an "example" and that wasn't fair to me.

Wow, that's harsh about the "TV" and the novella rejections Scott. Natalie, I still think you did the right thing.

Thanks
I'm still tempted to send him "Misplaced Enthusiasm!"

My latest rejection, and while it is definitely not the worst I have received, the editor's insistence that the manuscript be "mechanically perfect" subverts the artistic integrity of the craft.

I agree that if a submission is rife with grammatical or punctuation errors than it may not be suitable for publication, AND as an editor I have no excuse for these errors.

However, torpedoing my submission on the basis of two very minor errors seems pompous and elitist to me. I run ALL of my accepted Shroud submissions through a copyeditor, and even the best of writers slip up from time-to-time, but the quality of the story shines through.

Here was the rejection:

"This is an old school editor here.

If you're a writer, you've got the mechanics down, okay?

I demand that manuscripts be virtually perfect mechanically if they are to be given serious consideration.

There's no way around it: A writer must be a master of the basics.

Get the best "write it right" book there is, Strunk and White's The Elements of Style.

Then, follow the rule all pro writers do: When in doubt, look it up.
Best,

XXX"

At least it was not a form response though.

And I think I have a problem with the the statement that begins with "I demand..." Is this the kind of relationship this editor wants with writers? It just sounds a bit adversarial to me.

Thoughts?